2005-04-07
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Hmm.. it would appear that someone loves me. I've been granted a scholarship to a nearby college because I'm in the top 30% of my graduating high school class. Boy. I should be happy, I should be celebrating my success, but I can't. I won't. My mother is drunk off her ass, and as usual: being around drunken people depress the hell out of me. I nearly cry from depression every time someone gets drunk. It hurts me that I can't help them, and that they drive themselves to the bottle. I can't help them. How can I go about cheering myself up? Writing in my little diary of course.
I've become dependant on this little outlet of mine. I've come to need it to release all this emotion of mine, to release everything that I can share to no one else. Nobody really knows who I am if they read this, so how can they ridicule me for how I'm acting? I hope mother will sober up soon, I don't like her being drunk. But.. she's laughing. She's actually laughing.
-Faust
faust-8 at 9:11 p.m.